ahhh
i love jon stewert.
i underestimated his humor - holy crap he had me rolling on the floor last night.
or, as eric put it, having convulsions in my seat.

i laughed so hard at two points that not only did i have to wipe tears off my cheeks but i couldn't catch my breath and was gasping for air. And once I threw my head back in laughter and felt my neck strain.

HA!

... of course once was when he was talking about his cat!!!!!
the other time was about fucking a pinata.

which after the bit he says referring to himself "oh, he's not that nice man i see on the tv every night..."

or maybe it was after the bit about fucking a pumpkin....hmmmmm.......

LOVE!

he did a mix of material - about a quarter of it i had heard before -
but stands the test of time - like, what, 15 years?
Alot more Jew stuff, which to me, since i can relate to it, was super funny.

funniest part of the night was actually AFTER the show when we were
walking out and were behind a couple of older people and one man
shakes the hand of another man who walked towards him and says "i
can't believe he just said 'macham smachem fuckim' in front of my
rabbi!" and they both laughed.

it was one of the last jokes jon told - maybe you've heard it before
cause i had, about all the jewish holidays and him calling in sick
saying it was a jewish holiday called "macham smachem fuckim"?

eric was so embarrassed he walked waaaay behind me cause i started laughing out loud cause - 1, a rabbi at the show 2, well, a rabbi at the show?!

cool.
i just love to laugh.
i realize i just don't do it enough.....

it's sunday so i can play catch up on everything - including 366 pics - 4 days worth!

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i'm starting to take wellbutrin again.
fuck it.
sometimes it is just chemical inbalance that we have no control over.

i've really been too up and too down lately.
and i don't like it.
and i know feeling emotion is normal but feeling so high and so low can't be.
i don't care what you say.

little things just throw me into tailspins.
the weekend was going fine.
yesterday was pretty cool.
today was alright.
i tried to scrapbook and was frustrated by my lack of creativity and mojo.
made a shitastic weekly page i don't even know if i'll share it sucks so bad.

then i got the email.
the one telling me i am not good enough to warrant an interview with the company i sent my portfolio too.
and there goes the downward spiral.
and all the self loathe and doubt creeps back in.

so then what do i do?
the smartest thing i could ... decided to try on the dress i bought for april's wedding in two weeks.
and, but of course it doesn't fit.
can't get it zipped up.
so yet another thing i fail at.

so, never mind me.
just another sunday night.
the worst time of the week ever.
cause, yay, in 9 hours i get to start the work week yet again.
and i pour my 2nd shot of scotch.

fail.