just got on my bike for the first time in at least 6 months
and biked to grant park.
i don't know how far it is, but the main issue is how hilly it is.
atlanta is very very hilly.
anyway i feel like shit now.
i dont know whether to throw up, take a shit, pass out, drink some water, take a shower, breathe deeply, have eric drive me to the hospial....
i was hoping for some endorphins or something
to motivate me to get back on
but
fuck.

in other news i tracked down my first true love from college on myspace last night.
i've had several people track me down from college and high school
and i've always wondered what happened to marc
and i've googled him before
and had my friend who worked for the gas company try to search for him using all their fancy tools
but to no avail.
and there he was last night - the 2nd link i clicked on.
i dont even know what to write.
he broke my heart into many millions of peices.
13 years ago.

So today my brother and I climbed up Stone Mountain.
I don't know what the fuck i was thinking it would be, even though the name had both "stone" and "mountain" in it, but it kicked my ass.

15 minutes into it it became very apparent how horribly out of shape i am.
after 45 minutes i was scared that my body was going to fall apart from the shooting pains in my knees and quivering quadriceps.
i mean i was really scared.
moreso because i have no idea why i have let my body fall apart so far.
i have no idea why i can't take care of my physical self.
what is stopping me?!
i know what i have to do, yet i can't do it!
for godsakes i haven't been to Curves in nearly a month and I can't figure out how to drag myself there!

anywho, i promised piepiepie i wouldn't call myself fat anymore, so here's a picture of me conquering the top of the mountain with the city of Atlanta in the background (you can kinda see it through the smog):


here's a cooler shot of me, ahem, resting at the top:


Now, I'm laying on the couch with the doggies trying to determine how much my muscles are going to hurt tommorrow.

BUT, oh ya, I signed up for a Commuting Biking class next month. I'd like to try and do that possibly.

My horoscope is spot-on perfect:

It's never surprising to find you lost in a daydream about far-away places. You'll be doing a lot of that now, especially if current circumstances aren't everything you wish they were. Hang tough. It's almost time for your vacation.

***************************************
Speaking of hanging tough, it's 29 degrees out and I'm still going to fucking bike to work.
*deep breath* I can fucking do it!

yippe - i got Depeche Mode tickets today.
Unfortunately it's at an arena in Chicago, which SUX and really bums me out but it's FUCKING DEPECHE MODE!
And the tickets are pretty decent cause I got in on the pre-sale.

I was biking to work today and I ran over a duck - it didn't even try to get out of my way like all her duckie buddies had.
I screamed "FUCK YOU!" at it and this poor woman who was walking ahead turned back all confused - it occurred to me long after I passed her she probably thought I was yelling at her. doh!